Day 3: About my Hometown...

Today's prompt is "about my hometown".  The first question is, what's my hometown?  I was born in Sacramento, spent my first 13 years in Norfolk, Nebraska, attended high school and continue to visit my family every year in Lincoln, Nebraska, and currently live in and plan to raise my family in Reno.  I have lots of love for Lincoln and Reno, but for today's prompt, I'm going to write about my OG hometown:  Norfolk, NE.

Norfolk is a small town of 21,000 people, with no bigger population towns anywhere within 100 miles.  One thing that's fun about small Midwestern towns is that everyone is very loyal to the local sports team.  The varsity football and basketball games are social events for the whole town, and if the team makes it to state playoffs, the fans will caravan en masse to root root root for the home team.  This is a super fun way for the townspeople to have a sense of unity and camaraderie, and I'm grateful I got to be a part of it for many years.  (And even to play on some Norfolk Panthers teams in junior high.) 

I'm especially grateful for 1994, when the Norfolk Panthers beat the Benson Bunnies to win the Class A State Football championship, and in that same season, the Nebraska Cornhuskers won the National Championship.  Sports fandom does not get much better than that!

Day 2: About My Health...

Backpacking trip up Mt. Blanca

 I am grateful for the great blessing of good health so far throughout my life.  Health is one of those things that I often take for granted, so it's good to have a prompt to remember what a difference it makes.  When I was younger, good health allowed me to participate in many fun and memorable activities - volleyball and track teams in high school and college, climbing mountains while living in Colorado, and running half marathons.

Now that I'm older, every brief bout with sickness or injury reminds me how much I rely on good health to take care of my family.  Caring for little kids takes a surprising amount of energy and physical stamina, and it's really hard to manage when you as the caretaker are ill, or when part of your body needs to rest because it's injured.  I've never had a major or chronic illness or injury, and I'm extremely grateful for that.

30 days of gratitude, 2018. Day 1: About My Family

(I got this challenge from scaleitsimple.com)

One of the nice things about having a blog that you write just for fun is that you get to choose
your own pace of writing and posting.  This is also one of the hard things.  Fall is traditionally a slower time of blogging for me.  This is partly because there are many extras in our life this season (all the kids' birthdays, back to school and IEPs and Katie Beckett, all the holidays), and partly because my mood somewhat mirrors the seasons, so fall feels like a time for reflection and melancholy rather than prolific writing. 

However!  If you don't post at least once in awhile, then your blog dies. So I'm going to start my 30 days of gratitude early this year because 1) i want to keep the blog going, 2) my perspective could use a gratitude ramp up starting immediately; and 3) this will allow for a few days off of blogging between now and the end of November.

Here's the full 30 day challenge, if anyone wants to join in the fun!  I will put this first day up on Facebook, but the rest I will only post on my blog.

Day 1:  About my family...

I am grateful for Kenny because he is smart and thoughtful, and the way he thinks about life and faith and politics challenges me and makes me grow.  I'm grateful for his wry sense of humor.  I'm grateful for the musical interludes he brings to the house when he plays guitar.  I'm grateful for the way he sets goals and achieves them, and for the way he has dreams for the future.  I'm grateful for his creativity and his writing skills.  This list really just scratches the surface.

I am grateful for Josh because of his sweet smile, his sense of fun, his passion for the things he's interested in (and anyone who knows him knows what those things are!), his strength and persistence in the face of adversity, and his kind heart.

I'm grateful for Zoey because of her sensitive spirit, her sharp wit, her funny combination of strong feelings and empathy combined with a heavy dose of logic and rationality, her love for her rope, her creativity expressed through dancing, and her love for her family.

I am grateful for Ivy because she's always ready to have a dance party, she was born with more social and emotional intelligence than I will ever have, her big eyes see everything, and she brings so much fun and love to the family. 

I am grateful for Gus because he's loyal and affectionate and a good friend to all of us.

What are you grateful for about your family? 

Ode to the Blue Carpet

This blog post is an ode to our now removed blue carpet.  We changed out our flooring a few weeks ago, and I'm thrilled that we got that opportunity because it's now easier to clean, better for allergies and asthma, and better looking.  But the blue carpet was the defining look of the first 3 years in this house, so I want to post a few pictures in memory before I get to the before and after reveal at the end.

Nice soft surface for babies

Playing ferry boat - blue carpet doubles as pretend water

Soft surface for wrestling

Playing pirate boat, again with the pretend water

Posing for soooo many pictures

Soft surface for playtime

Now that I've paid proper tribute, here's the before and after reveal:

This is the before...

...and this is the after!

Liturgy of the Ordinary

I've been thinking about how to make my Christian faith a more organic, integrated part of my day to day life.  I'm doing okay on things like regular church attendance and regular quiet times, but even if those things are done with 100% faithfulness, they still just make up a small fraction of time in my week.  If my faith is the most important thing to me, it deserves more time and attention.  But how does that work out practically, with the demands of life?  With jobs and kids and household chores, not to mention the daily Facebook scrolling?  It already feels like a fight to carve out the fraction of time that's devoted to God.

I was looking for ideas along the ideas of Brother Lawrence's wonderful classic "The Practice of the Presence of God".  His idea is that you DO continue to go about your life - you peel potatoes, you wash dishes - and you stay in community with God at the same time.  I love this idea, and I was eager to find a book that fleshed out this idea as applied to modern life.  I found this book, and remarkably, it is also thoughtful, well written, funny, and steeped in good theology.  (And it will make you want to become an Anglican!  I am not currently Anglican, but I have a lot of love and respect for Anglicans.)  The book is called "Liturgy of the Ordinary: Sacred Practices in Everyday Life" by Tish Harrison Warren.

Warren takes eleven moments out of an ordinary day - things like brushing your teeth, losing your keys, checking email - and combines them with eleven spiritual practices in Christian life.  This sounds gimmicky, and in the wrong hands it certainly could be, but in this book it is SO well done.  (It's worth noting that The Gospel Coalition and Sarah Bessey both agree with my enthusiastic endorsement, so this book has a broad range of support in the Christian community.)  The idea is that there are reminders of God working in the world and working his redemption in us constantly, every day, in the most mundane moments, and she illuminates some of the ways we can watch for this and be blessed (or be challenged to grow) as we go about our lives.

Some highlights (these are just a few examples, as every chapter had great stuff; and these just give you an idea of the content, it's her fleshing out of the ideas that makes this book special):

• Losing your keys - this chapter was linked to confession, and the idea was that how you respond to the little irritations of life is a good barometer of where your heart is at.  Often we think of confession in relation to bigger things, but there are little moments every day where we lose our cool, or act selfishly, and the opportunity here is to notice this happening, and take the opportunity to confess and receive forgiveness and acceptance.  
• Calling a Friend - this chapter is linked to being in Christian community and gives a robust argument for being involved in a local church.  
• Eating Leftovers - this chapter was linked to both Communion and reading the Bible.  She talks about how you need to eat over and over, and while the vast majority of your meals will be very ordinary and forgettable, you absolutely need them to bring you life.  And that the type of food you eat can bring more or less health over time.  
• Fighting with My Husband - she links this with Passing the Peace, and writes about how the bulk of the "loving others" command in the Bible involves loving your family and closest friends well - and this is often the very hardest thing to do.  
• There is lots of value given to enjoying the pleasures of life, and sleep linked to Sabbath - I loved these ideas.

Also, she concludes her Acknowledgments section with my favorite sentence that I have ever seen and probably ever will see in an Acknowledgments section:  "And glory be to the Word, from whom any goodness in our little words flows, and by whom they will be redeemed."

This is a book I will return to again and again, and  I hope I have convinced at least a few of you to check it out.  It's that rare gem that is thoughtful and deep, but also very easy to read and applicable to real life.

America: Remembering the Good while Taking on the Bad

The week of Independence Day always makes me reflect on the state of things in America.  Like many, there are so many changes I would like to see.  Just to name a few:

• I would love to see changes in policy and law around guns, mental health, abortion, and immigration.  
• I would love to see more money go towards public education and public health insurance, enabling meaningful reforms. 
• I would love it if the population of our country was kinder and more empathetic, more thoughtful and less reactive, more solution-oriented rather than polarized.  I would love it if *I* was more of all the good things and less of all the bad things.
• I agree with the movements  #FamiliesBelongTogether and  #BlackLivesMatter and would like to see progress made on these fronts.

But.  I think it's also important to remember all the GOOD we have in America.  Again, just to name a few (and the disclaimer that I'm not saying there are zero problems in these areas):

• I can put up Facebook posts about all the things the government is getting wrong and not have someone show up at my door and arrest me.  I can call a Congressman directly and tell him I don't like how he voted on an issue, and he'll write me a letter thanking me for my opinion. 
• I can assemble with my fellow Christians at our house of worship or at a barbeque and no one tries to stop us.
• We have a safety net to help people meet survival needs.  
• Because many of us have our survival needs met, we are able to think about things besides just how to survive, like how to make our country better for all people.  
• The law enforcement agents and courts don't take bribes, and they don't work only for the rich.  Violent crimes are prosecuted.  
• We have free public education guaranteed for everyone, and we have many of the finest universities in the world.
• Libraries!!
• Our health care system can take on extremely complex problems and save many lives that couldn't be saved at any other time or place in history.  (But when the bill comes, I'll boot that up to the list of challenges above.)
• Our tech innovators are coming up with amazing solutions to make life better and to solve some of the world's most pressing problems.
• We have spectacular natural features, and parks that are dedicated to preserving this nature.
• We have time and public spaces for leisure activities.

I write both of these lists because I think it's so easy for all of us, myself included, to drift into thinking either that America is *all* bad or it's *all* good.  It's hard to hold simultaneous mental space for both the blessings and the challenges.  But I think both are really important - remembering the good keeps us grateful for what we have, and remembering the bad motivates us to be better. 

Happy birthday, America!  I'm grateful to live in this country, grateful that we have the freedoms to fight to make it better, and hope to see positive change as time marches on.  

Why I Participate in Awareness Days

Example awareness meme, also a plug for a great organization!

If you have been Facebook friends with me for awhile, you may have noticed that I frequently post about special needs awareness days, such as the picture in my profile right now (if you're reading this in the week I post it), or like this meme to the left.  I also post frequently about various things in the special needs world...pictures of our appointments, articles about IEPs, and so much more.  Why?

Part of it, as with all things social media, is for attention.  (I don't mean this accusatorily - I post stuff daily, so whatever finger might be pointing at you the reader with this statement, there are four big fat fingers pointing back at me.)  But sometimes I'd rather not have the attention for this particular thing.  It's always fun to post pictures and get likes from a day at Lake Tahoe, but it's not always fun to draw attention, yet again, to the special needs stuff.  Sometimes it sounds very appealing to fly under the radar with these kinds of things.  Here is why I post about awareness days and doctor's appointments and all the rest of it anyway:

• Education - It helps you know how to support me, and possibly also how to support those close to you who have a loved one with some kind of disability or special needs.  It gives you a picture of what we might be thinking about and how to talk to us.  I *welcome* conversations about the special needs world and I am not easily offended if you don't know the exact words to use :).
• Personal Sharing - When I post about appointments and milestones, it lets you celebrate or mourn with me.  If people want, they can pray for us.  It might give you some insight into why I'm looking extra happy or extra frazzled on a particular day.  There are things about this life that can feel very lonely, and it helps tremendously to be able to share it.  
• "Shine Bright" - when Josh was first born with lots of health difficulties (here's his story)(here's Kenny's excellent book about his story), and then again when he got his genetic diagnosis, it raised lots of questions about what his life was going to be like.  At both of those times, I wish I could've seen into the future how much good is in his life.  He's happy, he gets to do lots of fun and normal stuff, he's learning and growing, he gives and receives love - although there are struggles and extra appointments, it's a good life.  I hope this message reaches a few people who need to hear it - if you get a prenatal diagnosis of a genetic disorder, if your child receives a genetic diagnosis - there is so much beauty and goodness in this life.  (And if it would help you to talk to someone, I would love to be that person.  If you're not ready to talk but want prayers, I would also love to be that person.)  
• For decision makers - If you are on the school board, if you are a leader in your church, if you are a leader in your community or part of your local or state government - I hope you see stories like mine from time to time, and they convince you to put more emphasis on inclusion in schools, on creating a special needs program in your church, on funding a job training program for the developmentally disabled, or anything else that might come up in your area of influence.  
• For voters - As health care and disability issues come up in elections, I hope my Newsfeed gives you a story to connect with as you're thinking about how to vote.  
• For my tribe - If you are part of a special needs subculture, everyone lights it up on awareness days.  My Newsfeed is filled with "Shine Bright" profile pictures this week and it makes me smile to see the faces of fellow 4q kids.  It's like we're all sending our bat signal to each other.  

That's why I do all these special needs posts.  Other special needs parents, what would you add?