Back to Work - How's It Going?

I am about one month into the working life, so I thought I'd write a follow up blog about how things are going.  There are two parts to it - the return to work after such a long break, and the combining homeschool with work - so I'll split it up that way.    

Lawyer hours

What It's Like to Go Back to Work After 13 Years

This has been a mix of all kinds of emotions:

• The first time back to anything significant feels like jumping in the deep end of a freezing cold pool.  The first time back at court.  The first time drafting a pleading.  Etc.  But then you do it, and you survive, and it's exhilarating to be back at it.
• There are moments where it feels frustrating to be this far along in life and this early in the career.  Like, I shouldn't be asking the most beginner of questions in the same year where it might be time to get bifocals.   
• It's satisfying to get back into the legal world - it feels like an important part of my mind is coming back.  I want to be clear here - stay at home parents, and particularly homeschool parents, are using their brains a ton - that could be a whole separate post - but it's not the same type of thinking as legal analysis.  
• It feels good to be contributing financially to the family, even though Kenny's still taking on the bulk of that responsibility.  

The main thing that's been really different this time v. 13 years ago is how much remote work changes the entire nature of the job.  This job used to be much more social.  I chatted with my colleagues in their offices at least a couple times per day; talked to the other lawyers we go up against before and after court; saw the other people who are part of this work at meetings.  Now, pretty much all of it takes place by Zoom, and the in-between social interaction with people has disappeared.  There are definitely some positives to this, but it's striking what a difference it makes.    

What It's Like to Balance Homeschool and Work

Homeschool hours

The first couple weeks were unbelievably exhausting, but as I settle in, the hours are balancing out about like I hoped they would.  Half the day goes to school and half the day goes to law, and I try to keep it pretty separate.  Occasionally I have to take a work call during school hours, or I might work on the homeschool library list while I'm sitting in the Zoom waiting room for court, but in general it's helpful to keep them as two different worlds.  

Both lawyer and homeschool mom are an identity, and those identities are pretty hilariously different.  How you act, what you do, what it's expected the whole rest of your life is like.  I actually love this part of it, as both sides feel like a piece of who I am, and neither feels like the entire thing.  The things that are stressful in each are different, so one provides relief to the other, going both ways.  And the things that are rewarding in each are different, and the contrast helps bring out the positives.  

The thing that feels hardest is that these are both primary gigs.  They are both my priority.  They are both things where I'm continuing to puzzle about how to do it better or how to fix a particular problem or what I have left undone after the actual "work hours" are over.  On a day to day scheduling basis, law wins - you can't skip court because you have a previously scheduled homeschool group - and luckily, homeschool is flexible enough that it mostly works out fine to flex around the more set law schedule.  But looking at how things have worked out over a whole week, or a whole month - if there's not enough time and energy to get them both done well, then it's not going to be okay to keep doing both.  Thankfully, so far so good.

On good days, I feel so blessed to have this life.  I can't believe that it's worked out that I still get to have this very significant chunk of time with my kids, get to educate them the way I want, get to continue on this path that has worked so well for us.  But still somehow also get to resume life as a lawyer in a significant way and work a job that I really enjoy.  On days where one or both pieces are hard, I feel overwhelmed.  But really, this is not so different from all the other working and / or homeschooling parents out there! 

There are lots of other homeschool parents who work, so I'd be interested to hear from any of you how you what you think about the balance.  And friends who have gone back to work after years of staying at home with young kids - I would love to hear your thoughts on that.