But I think a second reason we hear negatives over positives is because the positive experiences are more quiet, less splashy - but they build something beautiful over time. So, I'm going to list out some of the really positive things we've experienced in the local church (at both our current church body, Dayspring, and churches we've been a part of in the past). I hope this rings true to those of you who are part of a church, and maybe can also be an encouragement to anyone who's been thinking about getting involved in a local church.
Here we go:
- People pray for you - we all hit hard times in life, wonderful times in life, and uncertain times in life. It is so, so great to have a group with whom to share the ups and downs, to ask for prayers and to share praises. Ever since group text became a thing, one of my favorite and best uses of group text is sharing prayer requests and praises with people from my church.
- People know you and check in with you - This follows partly from sharing prayer requests, and partly from seeing each other every Sunday and often at mid-week groups as well. People know if you have trips coming up, or if there was a job change, or if something's going on with your kids, and they ask about it. People notice if you're gone and check in about that. Loneliness is a huge problem in our society right now, and having a group who knows what's going on with you and sees you every week goes a long way towards helping this.
- People help you in tangible ways - They bring you meals. They give you rides. They visit you in the hospital. The church facilitates you helping people in these same ways. We've been the recipient of many meals, and it's amazing how cared for this act of service makes you feel.
- People inspire you - We live in a pretty me-focused culture, so it really inspires me to see people who are using their time and talent to help others. This might look like working with orphans in Ukraine, or arriving at church at 7:30 am every week to set up chairs, or using your home to host all the events, or a thousand other things that help people in the church, the community, and the world.
- Friendships with purpose - People naturally gravitate towards those they have something in common with - same age group, same interests. But these friendships go deeper when you are united by the same belief system. I might spend the most time with others who have school aged kids, or who like to paddleboard, or who think that a book club is a great use of Friday night -- but these interactions are deepened when we have the shared link of faith.
- Multi-generational friendships - This is a surprise benefit that I love so much - you get to know people who AREN'T just like you, and specifically, who aren't the same age as you. Some of my favorite people and best mentors and encouragers are a generation up. They show me a life that I can strive towards if I continue in the faith, and they can give wisdom and perspective when I'm in the weeds of my own life stage. You also get a chance to get to know people who are a generation below, with all the energy and possibility and idealism that youth / young adulthood brings.
- People encourage you, support you, and help you grow - You are often embarking on shared projects together. This might be memorizing verses, praying and studying the Bible together, doing service projects together, discussing books together, or playing music together. These are all great ways to keep learning and keep growing, and when you do it with a group, you get more and better and deeper growth through the group working together.
These are things I really appreciate about my church. As always, please add your ideas to my list!
