Annie Dillard

Earlier this year, I read Annie Dillard's "Pilgrim at Tinker Creek", which is a Pulitzer Prize winning non-fiction book of reflections on nature with some philosophy, biology, and theology thrown into the mix.  This is very much NOT the kind of book that I normally read and it took some effort to get all the way through, but it was well worth the effort as it's the kind of book that lingers with you for months.  It could inspire all kinds of discussions, but for this blog post, I'll do two:  

1.  What is art?

The best kind of art shows rather than tells.  (Credit to Kenny for this idea.)  There are plenty of articles telling me that I should slow down, stop and smell the roses, unplug from technology, and spend time in nature.  I agree with these sentiments, but when you are just told to spend more time in nature, it feels like one more item on the to-do list.

What Dillard does, and what makes her writing true art, is she shows you examples of things in nature that are beautiful, or startling, or surprising -- and all of this makes you want to get outside and see an example of the thing she's talking about.  One example:  Eels  (yes, the snake-like sea creatures) sometimes migrate across meadows!  Check out this description:  "Imagine a chilly night and a meadow; balls of dew droop from the curved blades of grass.  All right:  the grass at the edge of the meadow begins to tremble and sway.  Here come the eels.  The largest are five feet long.  All are silver.  They stream into the meadow, sift between grasses and clover, veer from your path.  There are too may to count.  All you see is a silver slither, like twisted ropes of water falling roughly, a one-way milling and mingling over the meadow and slide to the creek.  Silver eels in the night:  a barely-made-out seething as far as you can squint, a squirming, jostling torrent of silver eels in the grass."  How crazy would it be to see that sight??

"Pilgrim" is full of examples like this, facts about nature that make me pay close attention to what's around me as I'm in the backyard or out for a walk.  I'm not paying attention to nature because some HuffPost article told me it would be good for me; I'm paying attention because Annie Dillard showed me examples of things that would be amazing to observe.

-------------
2.  I believe that God is eventually going to restore the earth to perfection - what will nature look like then?


A key part of my Christian beliefs is that, in the future, God is going to create a new earth, and that it will be perfect.  So in some ways it will be like what we have now - we will inhabit physical bodies, live in a real physical time and space where we can see and touch and taste, and still co-exist with nature and with other human beings.  But in more important ways, it will be nothing like what we have now, because all the bad things will be gone.  Our bodies will not be subject to health problems of any kind and they will not experience decay and death.  No more war, school shootings, poverty.  No more famine, tsunamis, earthquakes.  No more brokenness in relationships, abuse, abandonment.  No more of me acting in ways that are selfish, lazy, prideful, narcissistic, cowardly.

Going back to the book, Dillard describes in great detail how very brutal nature can be.  I tend to think of nature in a much more cartoonish, Bob Ross type way - beautiful mountain vistas, birds singing their songs to each other, turtles lazing in the sun.  Dillard talks about these kinds of things a little bit, but she spends much more time describing animal species that eat eat their own young, or purposefully abandon their newborns, or eat their mates.  She points out that 10% of the world's species are parisitic and ponders what it's like to live as a parasite (or as the host of a parasite).  It's a kill or be killed world for animals, from the most microscopic insects to the carnivores at the top of the food chain.

So my question is:  what will nature look like when the world is restored to perfection?  Will the parasitic species cease to exist?  Will there even be such a thing as a carnivore?  Will praying mantises no longer eat their mates?  Will poisonous animals no longer be poisonous?  I don't think we can answer any of these questions, but it's interesting to think about.

The New Jim Crow

I just read The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness,.  The author, Michelle Alexander, argues that  mass incarceration, and specifically the War on Drugs, has created a system that looks much like the old Jim Crow laws.  I approached the book with skepticism, thinking that although there is certainly some racial discrimination and disproportionately harsh effect on African American males in the criminal justice system, there's no WAY it's anything like Jim Crow - and I was astounded to see how powerfully she made her case.

The argument in brief is this:  Drug laws became much harsher in the early 1980s, and following that, drug convictions caused the prison population to explode.  Most of the people (around 90%) being arrested for drug crimes are black or brown, even though studies have shown that black and white people use and sell illegal drugs at the same rates.  At every stage of the criminal justice system - who gets stopped, who gets searched, who gets arrested, who gets better plea bargains and less severe charges, who gets tried in state v. federal court, who fares better in jury trials, etc. - black males receive dramatically harsher treatment than other groups.  A significant percentage of black males end up spending time in prison or on probation or parole for felony drug crimes (unlike other groups, and despite the fact that they are using and selling at the same rate as other groups).  Once you are labeled a felon, you automatically lose rights or face discrimination in a whole host of areas - voting, housing (both public and private), employment and professional licensing, educational loans, and public benefits - and it becomes really difficult to survive, let alone thrive, in mainstream society.  Often, this loss of rights hinders you for your entire life.  Because mass incarceration followed by loss of rights mostly affects African American men, it affects them in large numbers, and it affects them for their whole life, it creates a social order that looks a lot like the social order in the days of the Jim Crow laws.

At this point, it's important to acknowledge what I felt like was the major flaw in Alexander's argument:  the people who are subject to mass incarceration have violated a race neutral criminal law, and this is a *significant* difference from the Jim Crow laws that applied to all African Americans and no one else.  It might be because I was born in the 1980s and was fully indoctrinated into the War on Drugs rhetoric, but I think you can't just toss out drug laws.  Drugs wreak havoc in our society:  they cause collateral crimes of violence and theft, they destroy the lives of addicts, and they contribute to the abuse and neglect of children. It may be true that major reform is needed at every level of the system, but you can't just abolish drug laws, and you can't just forget that people have violated drug laws that are serving a legitimate purpose.

But putting that very significant issue aside, this book paints a vivid picture of how difficult every aspect of your life becomes once you are branded a felon, and it raises a whole host of issues, such as:

• What is the War on Drugs accomplishing, and specifically, is it accomplishing the goal of reducing drug use and drug related crime?
• Are prisons the best place to load up the dollars, or could the drug problem be addressed more humanely, effectively, and economically by focusing on education and treatment programs? 
• If mass incarceration is the appropriate solution to the drug problem, and if drugs are used and sold at equal rates by African Americans and Caucasians, then how do we get more of the white users and dealers convicted and incarcerated?    
• How do we create more fair treatment of African Americans at all levels of the criminal justice system?  And in portrayals of the criminal justice system by the media?  
• Why do we have mandatory minimum sentences on drug crimes?  Why can't we give judges the discretion to impose a harsh sentence where appropriate and a more lenient sentence where appropriate?  
• What is accomplished by not allowing felons or ex-felons the right to vote?
• Can we find a way to more narrowly tailor the restrictions ex-felons face, particularly in employment and housing?  Or come up with some separate program to support ex-felons as they re-enter society, so that they don't turn back to a life of crime because all the employment and housing doors are closed in mainstream society?  

If these ideas spark your interest - whether they strike you as right or wrong - then I would really suggest you read the book.  I have just skimmed the briefest surface in this post.  I don't fully buy into Alexander's thesis, but I learned a lot from this book and would highly recommend it.

Family & Josh health update August 2014

This week, we arrived home after two months of driving across the country and back.  We had a GREAT time seeing everyone - Reno friends and family, Nebraska friends and family - and it was sad to say goodbye to our two homes away from home.  But it's nice to be back in our own house, it's nice not be living out of a suitcase, and it's nice to get into a daily routine that will last more than a week or two :).

I wanted to write an update on Joshua's  health, since we have some really good things to report and also a couple prayer requests.  First, the good things:

• Oral feeding is going well!  We had our ups and downs during the summer, as our routine was constantly changing and for some reason J seemed to get sick every 3 weeks or so.  But he ate well enough to maintain his weight through the summer, which is really exciting and a huge step towards us being able to take the g-button out.  He has also learned to take his daily medications by mouth (or to put it more accurately, i have learned how to grind them up and hide them in his yogurt).  So now we will see if he continues to eat well this fall, and hope to take the G-button out around Christmas.
• J's speech continues to improve.  Last summer, J struggled to put together 2 word sentences, which was considered to be a significant delay.  This summer, he regularly strings together 5+ word sentences and he's doing much more interactive and spontaneous talking.  He hasn't had his speech evaluated recently, but it seems like he's making great progress.  One great thing about the road trip was that he got lots of cousin time in both Reno and Lincoln, as well as lots of new experiences, and I think both of those things were helpful for his speech. 

Prayer requests:

• Upcoming surgery - J has surgery scheduled for this Friday to get ear tubes placed and to get some dental work done.  This should be a simple set of procedures and they are not admitting him, but surgery is always a little scary.  Also, this is the first time that he will be aware of what's going on as we take him in for surgery, so I would especially appreciate prayers for peace and calm for J as he goes back to the OR and as he recovers from anesthesia.  
• Genetics appointment - In mid-September, we're taking J in for a genetics consult.  This appointment is always nerve-wracking because they can deliver information that has life-long implications.  It will be interesting to see how that appointment goes because apparently East Coast geneticists and West Coast geneticists do things differently.  West Coast geneticists, which is the only type J has seen so far, diagnose based primarily on physical examination, family history, etc.  East Coast geneticists are (supposedly) much more likely to do blood and DNA testing.  [By the way, as a total sidebar, it is SHOCKING how differently *really important* medical procedures are handled based on where your child was born.  Since J was treated at University of Utah as an infant, he got a jaw distraction to help with his breathing.  If he would have been treated in Virginia, he would have been trached.  Most of his specialists doctors out here have never seen a PRS child that wasn't trached.  We are extremely glad that J was born in a place where jaw distraction was offered as a treatment option rather than going straight for the trach.  End sidebar.]  So it will be interesting to see if the East Coast geneticists want to do a bunch of testing since minimal blood testing was done out in Utah.  

Other than that, life is back to normal around here.  J starts school after Labor Day and we are going to attempt potty training before then, so wish me luck!

Reno Myths Debunked and Trip Update

Reno is a unique town, and i mean that in the literal sense of the word ("being the only one of its kind").  Thanks to shows like Reno 911 and pop culture references like Johnny Cash's line "I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die", everyone has an idea of what Reno is like -- but many people haven't actually visited Reno.  So without further ado, here are some popular Reno myths, debunked:

#1:  Reno is just like Vegas, except smaller and seedier.  This summarizes most of the other myths, so I will break down why this is wrong in more detail below -- but Reno is WAY different than Vegas, and I think most everyone who lives in or is associated with Reno (including me) vastly prefers Reno over Vegas.

#2:  Reno and Vegas are geographically close to each other.  When I was in law school, the career counselor (who knew that we were considering Reno as a possible destination) kept sending me job listings in Las Vegas.  Reno is 452 miles - an 8 hour drive - from Las Vegas.  Commutes from Reno that would be much more doable than Vegas:  Lake Tahoe (48 minutes); Sacramento (2 hours); or San Francisco (3.5 hours).

#3:  Like Vegas, Reno's topography is all desert.  The first time I visited Reno, I was stunned by its beauty.  Reno is surrounded by the Sierra Nevada mountains and the Truckee River flows through the center of town. To the east of Reno is desert, but to the west is Lake Tahoe, and Reno draws geographic characteristics from both.  There are dusty mountain trails lined with sage brush, but there is also lots of green space and an alpine feel.

#4:  Like Vegas, Reno is unseasonably hot all the time.  Reno gets all 4 seasons, but the brutality of winter and the intensity of summer are subdued by the desert climate.  The temperatures get into the 100s in the heart of summer, but thanks to the desert climate, it cools down to 70 or below every single night.

#5:  Like Vegas, Reno culture is dominated by casinos.  While the casinos do play a part, local culture is also heavily influenced by:

• Reno's frontier history:  there is a heavy independent / libertarian sentiment here.  
• California influence:  California is less than an hour away, and you can see that influence in all sorts of things - the main example that comes to mind is, at the grocery store, the organic section is bigger than the meat section.
• Outdoorsy types:  If you are into outdoor sports, Reno is a wonderland.  In the summer, mountain biking, hiking, trail running, backpacking, kayaking, etc. are all easily available.  In the winter, the slopes of Lake Tahoe are less than an hour away.  This plays a significant part in what people do with their free time and expendable income.  

It would be dishonest to say that casinos have no effect on local culture.  They dominate downtown, they draw in tourists, and they boast some of the nicest restaurants and bars in town.  Because they advertise using scantily clad women, you see a lot more skin driving around Reno than other towns.  Although locals mostly avoid casinos, you can't avoid being around gambling - there are slot machines in every grocery store and gas station.  But when you live here, you get used to the casinos and slot machines really quickly, and soon you hardly notice them.

#6:  Prostitution is legal in Reno.  It's legal in other parts of Nevada, but not in Reno city limits.

#7:  All-you-can-eat sushi is a big thing in Reno.  This is true.  And it's glorious.  If I was a competitive eater, my food of choice would be sushi.

Thus concludes my Reno myth debunking, but Reno friends, please feel free to add to the list.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
For part two of the blog, here is a recap with the highlights of our Reno trip this summer.

-Family and friends time!  I am really blessed to have awesome in-laws.  (My mother-in-law Betty is pictured above reading a story to J.)  They are so kind, generous, and fun to be around.  And they allow (and even encourage!) us to crash with them for a month at a time.  This is no small thing when you've got two toddlers running around making noise and messes at all hours of the day.  I'm so grateful for them.  We also got to see lots of friends on this trip and attended some really fun get-togethers (including a children's tea party, pictured below, and a food truck rally).

- Wherever we are in our travels, we spend a lot of time at these places:  the park, the mall, the library, and the Children's Museum (or zoo / aquarium / local museum of choice).  Reno has a really nice children's museum complete with a model Truckee River, a star gazing room, a mining tunnel, an art room, and multiple block building rooms.  The kids loved it.

- Lake Tahoe - we made it up twice this month  First, we took the kids up for a beach day with their cousins and a good time was had by all.  (Joshua spent over an hour playing with a piece of drift wood, pretending it was a train.)  Second, Kenny and I had a really fun double date with Kenny's brother Jason and his wife Naomi to see As  You Like It at the Tahoe Shakespeare Festival.

- Dates with the hubs - this is the time of year when Kenny and I really get to spend one-on-one time together outside of the house, and it's so nice.

- Running on the Steamboat Ditch Trail - a couple times each week, I ran on this mountain trail near my mother-in-law's house.  It is so beautiful and peaceful and reminded me of Alamosa.

So now we are starting the journey back East.  In a couple days, we'll arrive in Nebraska, stay with my parents for 10 days, and then head home.  Hope to see some of you along the way!
-

Overprotected Children Culture Gone too Far?

Earlier this week, Ross Douthat of the NYT wrote an article about how children are overprotected and more specifically, how this trend of overprotection has led to parents being unfairly punished for not hovering over their children.  This idea - that the culture of overprotecting children has gone too far, that parents who give their children independence are at risk of having their children taken away - seems to resonate with many.  I have three thoughts about all of this.

1.  I disagree that it's a bad thing to expect rigorous supervision of young children.  I still see plenty of older kids riding their bikes around the neighborhood alone, I see middle schoolers alone at the playground, and I see elementary age kids playing alone in their yard while the parent is in the house.  It is only the REALLY young kids - the preschool and youngest elementary kids - who are expected to be supervised by someone all the time.  And since I spend a lot of time with toddlers these days and have seen their total lack of judgment and impulse control, and how quickly they can put themselves in serious danger, I think it's totally appropriate to expect rigorous supervision of younger kids.  (Note:  I'm not saying that it's easy or that I do it perfectly or that it's not a major challenge for people without support.  I'm just saying that it seems like a reasonable expectation that young kids need to be actively supervised.)

2.  I disagree that kids are wrongly being thrown into the foster care system because of our overprotective culture.   I spent two years representing abused and neglected children in their foster care cases, and when it comes to removing kids from their home, it's very rarely the case that the kid gets removed without reasons that go far a one time incident of a child being left in a park.  (It is much more frequently true that once a kid has been in foster care for awhile and the parents have made their home safe, the system can be too slow in allowing the kid to return back home.)   The cases described in the article where the kids were left at a park, or wandered through a parking lot near home unsupervised, or were at home alone for a few hours and then ended up in the foster care system -- not once in my hundreds of cases did I see a situation like this, unless this lack of supervision was the pattern rather than a one time exception.  These events might cause someone to call CPS, and cause CPS to open an investigation -- but a court is unlikely to remove a kid from their home based on a one time incident of lack of supervision.  Kids get removed because they are left alone for days at a time, or because they are abandoned indefinitely with a friend or relative, or because the pattern of being left alone has caused some kind of harm to the child (like missing a bunch of school, or the child injured himself because of lack of supervision, or the child developed attachment disorder) - not because they are left at the park once for an hour.  I'm not saying that the child welfare system never makes a mistake, or that there aren't some outlier cases where something like this might happen.  But if you're providing a generally safe home and someone reports you to CPS because your 10 year old child was playing unsupervised in the park, in the vast majority of cases, nothing will happen - the case will just close.

3.  There should never be a case where a child gets removed from a loving home just because the parent is poor.  The real story here, which is mentioned briefly in the article, is how this "culture of overprotection" is especially hard on single parents who do not have child care and somehow still have to find a way to provide for their family.  These are the cases where kids do get removed from the home -- where parents do have to turn lack of supervision into a pattern, and where this lack of supervision (at least allegedly) causes harm to the child.  This seemed to be the case for at least half of the parents profiled, and these are the ones that really tug at the heart strings.  I absolutely 100% could-not-agree-more that struggling parents need more child care support as they take steps towards economic self sufficiency.  The lack of affordable child care is hugely problematic for single parents who must meet work requirements in order to receive welfare, food stamps, and housing benefits, or who are trying to attend school or a job interview so that they can provide for their family.  We should design public assistance programs so that parents aren't forced to make these tough decisions - for example, by ensuring that parents can always get the child care support they need or else be exempted from work requirements in public assistance programs.  And for all parents struggling to find child care as they attend job interviews, community college, etc., we need to have more affordable, flexible hours, conveniently located, high quality child care available.    To me, this seems like one of the absolute best things government subsidies or charitable funds could be supporting.

 What do you think about the article, or about the idea that kids are overprotected, or about anything else on this topic?

Road Trippin 2014

After three days of driving, a 10 day stop in Nebraska, and three more days of driving, we made it to Reno!  Here are some notes from the road and pictures* of the type of scenes we saw on our drive:

Smoky Mountains in Western Virginia*

-- It was fun to drive across the United States in the weeks leading up to the 4th of July, as it was a good reminder of what a geographically diverse, spectacularly beautiful country we live in.  My favorite parts of the drive this time were the Smoky Mountains and the Park City / Salt  Lake City area of Utah.

Stan Musial Veterans Memorial Bridge in St. Louis*

- - We've done the 1400 mile Nebraska-to-Virginia trip in 1 day and 2 days.  This time, we took 3 days, and we all preferred the slower pace.  This allowed us to make longer stops, explore the towns along the way, and make 3 park stops per day.  Which leads me to comment on a type of story that's been trending lately, first as a cover story in  The Atlantic  and more recently as an article in the New York Times:  the idea that playgrounds can be too safe and this is bad for older kids (they need danger, they need sensory experiences, they need exercise and won't use equipment designed for toddlers, etc.).  These reporters should visit the middle of the country to find their park utopia.  We consistently saw parks that would be great for older kids -- huge slides  and challenging climbing structures; old school equipment like merry-go-rounds; zip lines; etc.

Nebraska (aka The Good Life)*

-- We spent most of our time in Nebraska hanging out with family, which i loved.  There is just something about being in Nebraska that refreshes my soul and makes me feel like everything is right in the world.  That's laying it on a little thick, but seriously, I just love spending time in Nebraska.

Wendover, Nevada*

- - One of our hotel nights was spent in Wendover, Nevada (pictured above).  This town, wedged between the Salt Flats of Utah and the barren dessert of eastern Nevada, is so very in the middle of nowhere that it sort of feels like you're on the moon.  And then, unexpectedly, these bright lights appear on the horizon, and you see what appear to be three huge Vegas style casinos in this tiny little town out in the boonies  We've driven through Wendover a dozen times and I have always been SO curious about these giant casinos in this tiny little town, so this time we stayed in the Wendover Peppermill.  It turns out that the casinos are not quite up to Vegas or Reno standards in terms of amenities.  The gaming floor is huge and the hotel rooms are spacious, but aside from the actual casino, there are no amenities - no pool, no dozens of restaurants, no nightclub, no spa.  So if any of you are tempted by a too-good-to-pass-up weekend getaway trip to Wendover:  I'm going to strongly urge you to reconsider.  But if you're driving through on I-80 and looking for a big hotel room for a good price in that general area, then Wendover might be the perfect stop for you.

Wyoming*

-- The kids have been doing great with the driving.  Joshua likes to watch for trains, and we have seen dozens in the western half of the trip.  We've had some difficulty with Joshua's eating while we travel.  It really helps him to have routine - eating the same meal at the same time and place each day - and of course this is really hard to manage with traveling.  Now that we're in Reno for a month, we've been able to set up more of a daily routine, and his eating is picking up.  I don't think he's lost weight yet, and if things do get worse, we've still got the G-button in place and can use it if needed.  But I would appreciate prayers for Joshua's eating during our summer travels.

We will be in Reno for most of the rest of July, and then back in Lincoln for 10 days at end of July and beginning of August - if you are a Reno or Nebraska friend, I would love to see you!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
* None of the photos pictured in this post were taken by me.  All were found by doing a Google Image search of my favorite areas through which we drove.  If, for some unimaginable reason, this blog post gets a big readership, I will go back and post photo credits.

Summer time

We are approaching our second annual cross country road trip, which will be very much like last year's trip  except that we will be on the road for two months rather than three.  (In case anyone's wondering about travel details:  We will be in Lincoln for a week in the middle of June and then the first two weeks of August, and we will be in Reno for most of July.)  Strangely enough, this unusual way to spend the summer will be only the second time where we have a "repeat" summer in the eight years we've been married.  Here's a little walk down memory lane of the  past eight summers:

2006:  We kicked off the summer by getting married in Lincoln and honeymooning in Maui.  Then we moved to Oakland, CA, where we subletted a studio apartment.  I clerked for a housing law non-profit; Kenny clerked at his Uncle Brian's law firm.  We dined on Easy Mac and sushi, took day trips into San Francisco, and attended church in Berkeley.

2007:  We stayed with Kenny's dad in Reno and studied for the bar exam.  When we needed study breaks, we would have free throw contests or drive over to McDonalds for a yogurt parfait.  We took the bar exam in a casino, then celebrated when it was over.  In August, we used my Honda Civic to haul a trailer of stuff as we moved from Durham to Lincoln.

2008:  We lived in Lincoln.  I made my very first court appearance, arguing a class action Medicaid case.  Kenny finished up a judicial clerkship and spent the months before starting his new job at a law firm writing and playing golf.

2009:  We lived in Reno, for the first time in a house that we owned.  Kenny was working at a law firm, I was working at Legal Aid doing child advocacy.  Kenny managed to convert our backyard from a dirt pile into a pleasant place to spend time.  We enjoyed our two new puppies, had barbeques, and took day trips to Truckee.

2010:  This was our first "repeat" summer - still lived in Reno, still both working - but this time I was pregnant.  So lots of doctor's visits and laying around moaning about the heat :).  Work was busy that summer - I had to prepare for 4 trials right before my due date.

2011:  This was our craziest summer.  In June, we were trying to sell the house in Reno, Joshua had his most major surgery (the jaw distraction in Salt Lake City), and Kenny was working on a huge case at work.  In July, we drove our family cross country to Virginia Beach and lived in a hotel for 10 days before moving into our new house.  In August, we experienced our first hurricane and then flew Joshua back to Salt Lake City for part two of his jaw distraction surgery.  J was on oxygen this whole time, which involved some interesting logistical challenges, such as establishing with Apria offices in every time zone.

2012:  We spent the full summer in Virginia Beach.  I was very pregnant.   Zoey was born in August!

2013:  We did our first summer road trip, detailed in several blog posts from last summer.

And now we are doing a repeat summer road trip.  Looking forward to seeing friends and family in Nevada and Nebraska!